T O P

TIL Jimi Hendrix was formally discharged from the military due to injury, however, Hendrix’s official discharge request reads: “Behavior problems, requires excessive supervision while on duty, little respect for regulations, apprehended masturbating in platoon area while supposed to be on detail.”

TIL Jimi Hendrix was formally discharged from the military due to injury, however, Hendrix’s official discharge request reads: “Behavior problems, requires excessive supervision while on duty, little respect for regulations, apprehended masturbating in platoon area while supposed to be on detail.”

Frptwenty

> masturbating in platoon area while supposed to be on detail That must have been quite an Experience.


ChristyM4ck

You'd think this would be a bizarre occurrence in the military, but it isn't.


zoobrix

You take a bunch of young guys, give them little freedom or opportunity to be able to interact with the opposite sex and people are surprised this would happen?


blaghart

Don't forget the financial incentives to marry the first vagina that puts out.


In_All_Over_My_Head

I kept hearing people talking about this but I don't know the details. Can you elaborate?


blaghart

you get better pay and living conditions if you're married.


H_Bek

It's the most retarded thing in the military


TheRabbit_123

I don't know man...


H_Bek

Good point.


TheRabbit_123

👍


Andre4kthegreengiant

BAH, son


Hewholooksskyward

Not necessarily. Almost a quarter of married military personnel qualify for Welfare.


jpopimpin777

But they still get paid more than those who aren't married. They will often get their own house near the base which beats living in the barracks.


Stohnghost

Maybe below a certain rank. My BAH is $2100+


blaghart

That's usually not for people living on base and active duty. That's typically for reserves and blue star families.


Tampashrew

The military would be a far more sane place if military folks were given the same rights as civilians.


blaghart

Yea but then they wouldn't operate properly as a military.


MrJuniperBreath

Could they operate heavy machinery on benadryl?


LessWorseMoreBad

dont tempt me with a fun time


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blaghart

And they couldn't be effectively tortured into the necessary brainwashing to succeed at boot camp.


Onuma1

Boot camp isn't that hard. All you have to do is not quit.


Andre4kthegreengiant

Yep, some of my fondest memories are from bootcamp, shit is never funny until the guy next to you is getting yelled at & the DIs start with their comedy routine, some of them are legit funny, it's easy to maintain composure when you are getting yelled at, but very difficult if it's the guy next to you, I always bit the sides of my cheeks.


blaghart

I never said it was. It's still torturing people to brainwash them so they operate like soldiers instead of civilians. Like, that's the whole point of it, since sending civilians into a warzone doesn't tend to work out real well.


RobertBlackwoood

Wow I never thought about that


ProbablyGayingOnYou

As they say in the Navy, it's not gay if you're underway


conined

It's not queer if you're at the pier.


Xeranza

Until*


conined

Obviously not a submariner


PvtSherlockObvious

"once you've left the pier."


hazzagt3

Stick it in the rear


[deleted]

not to mention probably long periods of extreme boredom too


CamelSpotting

Or it's because they didn't want to go to Vietnam.


JustAnotherSoyBoy

And make them have strict timetables where they’re constantly surrounded by other dudes.


mixer99

I was stationed at a nuke site in Germany in the 80's. We used to joke that the only reason they made us wear flack vests on duty was to make it easier to sneak a copy of Hustler into the tower.


Effthegov

It's not even a weird occurrence, it's like every Thursday when the date is an odd number. I worked with a guy who was getting excited about leaving the desert and decided to clean up for his girl back home. He ordered chemical hair remover. He didn't learn they make sensitive skin versions. He went to the only place of privacy in a fire station in the desert, the shower. He didnt read the instructions that clearly warn against moisture. He lathered up and showered, realized he missed a bit and lathered up again. Before he could wash it off he was in the floor yelling for help. We go home soon after. He was still recovering and was a bit raw. She had been cheating on him since before we deployed and had moved out while we were gone anyway.


chakralignment

F


Effthegov

Yeah I felt pretty bad for him in between all the laughing at him. Another good one. Guy A - do anything for a dollar type Guy B - weakass stomach type We are TDY training. We have a day that we always go out for dinner/drinks before going home. This can easily get to $150+. Middle of the week, this is what goes down. Guy A filled a 20 oz. with piss. The group tells him we'll buy all his food/drink if he chugs the whole steamy bottle. He pounds it down like a champ. Burps the nastiest hot piss burp right in Guy B's face. Guy B instantly pukes on Guy A. Guy A also pukes. Guy B has escalated to straight up projectile vomit. It was like some Family Guy shit. Couple days later the group was invited out for our "party night." We spent the entire evening at a venue that had a full menu, full buffet, and a cornucopia of beers, wines, liquors on tap - all under a single price. ~$35 after currency conversion. *(What we americans think of as a buffet restaurant with a bar inside, but the full menu and all alcohol are also included in the buffet price.)* The group of us paid about $4 each for the piss drinking and IRL family guy scene. 10/10 would do again!


McMacHack

The Military, where catching a fellow soldier jerking off is one of the least unpleasant things you can go through


JimmyTheOtherCat

What is there to do on a base other than stand around and jack off?


screwballsmith

For anyone in the military who is trying to get kicked out and thinks this is a good idea, you should probably read Catch 22.


TeamKitsune

Who hasn't masturbated in the platoon area? Sheesh.


TurnkeyLurker

*Splatoon area


844Number1Fan

They are 14.... wait.


Aporkalypse_Sow

Surprisingly, I don't think Charlie Sheen did. But don't quote me on that.


scrotophobia

Donald Trump definitely hasn’t


BeauBWan

Glad you brought your shoehorn today.


JayConTal71

Best part, he was playing it upside down with his left hand


starmartyr

Bob Dylan actually did it first, but Jimi perfected it.


highkage360

It was the Jimi Hendrix experience..


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Minuted

I always thought it was "So let us not talk falsely now; While I was getting laid" Rather than the correct: "So let us not talk falsely now; The hour's getting late" Which to be fair does make more sense.


TaintModel

Dude was just grabbing his little wing for some night bird flying on a long hot summer night, know what I’m saying? Just waking up the old dolly dagger and burning the midnight lamp until you could hear his train a comin’.


CalypsoTheKitty

Hey Jimmy, where you going with that gun in your hand?


ChopperHunter

[this is my rifle, this is my gun, this is for fighting, this is for fun](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kU0XCVey_U&ab_channel=Melkor)


CalypsoTheKitty

I literally watched that movie last night!


ChopperHunter

If you haven't already, watch "Apocalypse Now" next. Another awesome Vietnam movie.


2goodforafreebanana

Eh, I'll watch Apocalypse Later


MrWeirdoFace

That certainly puts a spin on "gonna shoot my old lady."


m73m95

Tell me, are you, uhh, experienced?


slytrombone

Have you ever been experienced? Well, I ha-a-a-ave!


Thraxzan

Well now we know what he did all along the watchtower.


geeturbs

That's rock and roll, baby!


motegapel

I heard he did it all along the watchtower


masterbuttons

You could say it was the Jimmy hendrix experience


226506193

What a glorious way to be discharged tho... If I ever want to get fired I wish I could do that lmao but I don't wanna offend my coworkers I just want to offend my boss lol


Mrpoopypantsnumber2

>masturbating in platoon area while supposed to be on detail Legend


ThePatriarchyGG

We all do that. Details are garbage.


shoobsworth

Are You Experienced?


Mossmaster

He stood beside his own fire.


LeicaM6guy

TIL Jimi Hendrix should have been a Marine.


NotTodayDingALing

Is that where the injury occurred ?


ShaggysGTI

My man getting all Diogenes’ in here.


thekeffa

It's likely what happened was something called "Not fucking a man over" which happens a lot in the army. Believe it or not, people in the army (Any army really) want to look after each other. Whether it's not dropping someone in the shit, or covering for someone's infractions. It's quite likely though he was clearly unsuitable his officers and chain of command did not want to fuck him over with a dishonourable discharge or anything like that, so they put it down as a discharge due to injury, most likely the discharge request was the real reason they wanted him gone but a dishonourable discharge is often felt to have a very adverse effect in civilian life (In the US, it actually can in some cases). I had to request a discharge for a chap who was a very likeable chap, but he had no common sense or care or attention or even desire to his duty. The final straw came when he was given a Christmas duty as a punishment for something and he decided to steal a Land Rover (British Army's equivalent of a general duty vehicle like the humvee in the US army) and drive home himself. Not having enough money to refuel it, it ran out of fuel on the motorway and they guy called a breakdown service to come and recover him. Breakdown service took one look at the vehicle and called the police and the guys discharge was assured...after spending some time in jail. He was discharged for medical reasons... So yeah, I can fully believe although the real reason for Hendrix's discharge was that he was no good as a soldier, he was likeable enough those responsible for his discharge didn't want to screw him over by making it dishonourable.


PlaceboJesus

Dishonourable discharges typically prevent one from any kind of future security clearance, which can limit job options. It seems some employers view it as being equivalent to a criminal record. And really, if you just want the guy gone because he completely unsuitable (probably during a period of conscription), why screw him long term?


spaghettiThunderbalt

A dishonorable discharge is functionally more or less equivalent to a felony conviction, and getting one takes some serious fucking up to get. There are also bad conduct discharges, other than honorable discharges, and general discharges, which are all varying degrees of bad. Though usually those that just don't fit in get classified under a specific type of discharge (if discharged within the first 180 days), which is neither good nor bad ("soldier best serves the Army by separating from it"). Medical separation is a whole different ballgame.


thekeffa

Yeah I was generalising a lot because it's basically true for all armies everywhere (I am British Army though did a 2 year exchange with US Army Cav) so I didn't want to go into the plethora of options but clearly anything bad doesn't look good to an employer no matter which way it happens in any nation. The big, big, difference between our two armies is a dishonourable discharge does not equate to a conviction, outside of that they are functionally the same so the only way to avoid it looking bad is to basically write off your military service and not put it on your resume, as difficult as that would be with the obvious questions being drawn about what you where doing all that time.


daenreisn

Stealing an army vehicle to desert his duties sounds like someone who should get a dishonorable discharge.


EmbiidThaGoat

I believe you completely cops and the armies stick up for their own as priority almost everytime


[deleted]

Well, none of what Hendrix did would have resulted in a dishonorable discharge or bad conduct discharge. Those require a courts marshal resulting in a guilty verdict. At worst he would have received OTH, but if the majority of his work was satisfactory he may have still obtained a General. But I don't think your characterization of people covering for each other is accurate, at least nowadays (maybe back then in his service period it was). I was a commissioned officer and saw plenty of young members removed from service after Article 15s. I also sat on multiple characterization boards prior to their discharges, for myriad reasons. I've seen a guy retained in service after being caught drinking on duty because his service had otherwise been stellar. He got 45/45, half-month x2, reduction in rank during Article 15. But then I've seen guys booted for continously showing up late which we could argue isn't as bad as drinking on duty, and it was because their work was otherwise very substandard. Maybe you catch a dude jerking it but you still keep him in service because he's still doing an okay job (even if he had to be supervised a bit more) and you just can't afford to lose a body. Who knows, but none of us were there in Hendrix's case.


liarandahorsethief

That’s fucked up. The dude you described sounds like a perfect candidate for a dishonorable discharge.


dmcd0415

This is how you end up with Fort Hood


ShuRugal

Yeah, pretty much.


UncleDan2017

Smart man, rubbing it out may have saved him from wasting his life in Vietnam. The world was so much better off with him playing guitar, rather than being cannon fodder in a pointless war.


Sks44

Hendrix was very pro-military. He was proud of being in the Army. One story says his platoon Sergeant heard him play guitar and agreed to help him get out of his military service. The sergeant said he was too talented with the instrument to not be a musician.


sykemol

One story says he was rubbing one out while on duty so they kicked him out.


[deleted]

That cant be it. If every soldier got kicked out for getting caught cranking it there would be no military


Sks44

Yup. There are a few stories/theories. Hendrix claimed he was discharged after breaking an ankle on a parachute jump but that’s been proven to be poop. One biography of him stated he figured out you get discharged for being gay so he told a base psychologist that he was in love with someone from his squad. Most stories agree that he was pretty awful at the job.


MrWeirdoFace

>he told a base psychologist that he was in love with someone from his squad "'scuse me while I kiss this guy" *epic guitar riff *


chainmailbill

I learned that from literally the title of this post


pattycraq

Yeah, gonna go ahead and call bullshit on this. All you have to do is peruse the [Military Service section of his Wikipedia page](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimi_Hendrix#Military_Service) to see that he was forced to choose between military service or prison time, hated the day-to-day life in service, and his platoon sergeant said he "has no interest whatsoever in the Army".


Hanginon

He also went through, and passed Airborne training, which is all voluntary, mostly white, and had about a 50% fail rate at that time. Jimi had the chops, both in the Army and on stage.


Sks44

He shifted. He sent a letter to his dad saying he was gonna make him proud so the whole family could wear the 101st badge with pride. But he sucked at the gig. Overall, I think most casual fans would be kind of taken aback at some of Hendrix’s opinions. Like he was really, really anti-communist.


methodofcontrol

Why would anti-communism surprise people? Frank Zappa was anti-communsim as well, I don't think it's odd for members of the "counter culture" to be against the loss of private ownership.


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methodofcontrol

Shit, yeah I fudged that, gonna edit thanks.


MustardOnMyDog

Why would a fan be taken aback about an American being anti communist? As every American should be. I would be more surprised if he was pro communist.


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kickulus

because 16 year olds and shills infect this propaganda machine called reddit? every white male is a racist bigoted homophobe who should feel guilty about.. everything china is good and islam... we don't talk about islam.


insaneintheblain

No way to know this


SaltyShawarma

One story says he was sweeping the platoon public area. On a whim he picked up the broom and started jumping around, clutching the shaft loosely while riffing some sweet air guitar while making music with his mouth (babe). His Sergeant walked in at that moment and agreed that, with those moves, he would help him get out of the military. The sergeant said he was too talented with his tool to not be a musician.


Robolaserjesus

And that sergeant? Albert Einstein


awesomemofo75

It was his other tool that helped him get out


Sks44

Well, of course. That’s why it was just a story. We do know that he was stationed at Fort Campbell and would often go into Nashville to play guitar at clubs. He was caught missing bed check a few times because of it. https://i.imgur.com/Mz9XlhS.jpg


ulises314

Stop fucking projecting on Hendrix, he was not pro military.


Sks44

Ain’t projecting. He wasn’t anti-military and he didn’t protest the Vietnam war. That is stuff that was projected onto him. People said his Star Spangled Banner performance at Woodstock was some anti-war protest act. He was being interviewed by Dick Cavett and firmly refuted that idea. “Did you send the Americans away when they landed in Normandy? That was also interference... but that was concerning your own skin. The Americans are fighting in Vietnam for a completely free world. As soon as they move out, they will be at the mercy of the communists. For that matter, the yellow danger [China] should not be underestimated. Of course, war is horrible, but at present it's the only guarantee of peace.” -Jimi Hendrix


wreckanoyter

Did he think Dick Cavett was a Frenchman?


Sks44

The quote was from a different interview he did with a Dutch publication. The Cavett thing was about refuting the notion that his Star Spangled Banner was a protest/anti-war song.


HadSomeTraining

Overdosing on barbiturates is way cooler


championofcyrodil

Better to overdose on pill living the life vs burning down thatch huts and raping woman and killing children in a bullshit proxy war


HadSomeTraining

Plus he got to die sleeping. Sounds pretty good to me


spatz2011

whoa whoa whoa. we stopped the Commies from taking over the world.


[deleted]

Just in case this isn’t sarcasm you can do that without committing war crimes.


[deleted]

wait what? why are you saying jimi hendrix would have raped vietnamese women?


championofcyrodil

I’m saying nothing good would have came from it, because when you think of that war that’s the first thing that comes to people’s minds


kickulus

huge fuckin leap chief. that's a really solid way to condemn every person in the armed forces. seems like you take freedom for granted.


championofcyrodil

Naw, I just don’t abide people supporting a needless struggle that hurts more than it helps, I don’t condem the military anymore than they condemn themselves


awesomemofo75

Cuz he/she is a moron


just_the_D_tip

You mean masterbarbituates


notyogrannysgrandkid

No surprise he was so inspired by Bob Dylan’s line, “There must be some kind of way out of here.”


saliczar

"Actin' funny, but I dont know why."


Army0fMe

I mean, to be fair, in today's military that's kinda normal.


Unleashtheducks

Hendrix was actually a bit more Conservative than his hippie style might lead to believe. He was (like most of America at the time) actually for the Vietnam War when it started and everyone thought it would just be another Korea.


RaytheonAcres

uh, Korea didn't go all that well


handyjuanito

*chosin reservoir noises*


spaghettiThunderbalt

*Chesty has entered the chat*


handyjuanito

Well played!


[deleted]

It went well for half of Korea.


PrivateVasili

SK was just as poor as NK for a long time, and their personal freedoms weren't exactly great either. Today they're a booming economy and developed nation, but certainly at the time of the Vietnam War it hadn't done much good for them.


JustAnotherSoyBoy

Hey there’s still a South Korea so it did really. But there isn’t a South Vietnam so yeah...


insaneintheblain

Everyone is more or less a victim of the spirit of their times.


RaytheonAcres

He was doing it all along the watchtower


Newdy41

"We caught him white-handed, sir"


monkeyputz

But man could he play guitar...


thinker99

Just like ringing a bell


jcadsexfree

I think he was totally on the spectrum: a) left handed; b) perfect musical memory, especially for every guitar riff he ever heard in his life - he had an encyclopedic knowledge of soul and R&B riffs, from BB King to Lowman Pauling; c) didn't bother committing himself to learning to read music (which is actually OK if you depend on guitar for your living); d) had trouble looking people in the eye; e) he was the ultimate fish out of water, not getting acceptance in the chitlin circuit, and he had to be mentored by Chas Chandler and moved to Britain where his awkwardness was accepted as an aspect of his foreign origin; e) his shyness was thought to be part of his being a Southerner, being gentlemanly, and a minority (except he was from Seattle); f) he never made any sense in his interviews, which was thought to be an aspect of him being on psychedelics, which I doubt he was on in the first place; and (g) awkward gait.


methodofcontrol

>he never made any sense in his interviews, which was thought to be an aspect of him being on psychedelics, which I doubt he was on in the first place; I've seen an interview with him where he pointed at a girl behind the cameraman and said "that girl looks thirsty, get her some Acid". I think it's likely he enjoyed psychedelics frequently.


HCPwny

Yeah what? I was with OP until that claim. Dude did tons of acid. He would put a tab under his headband while playing shows sometimes. That famous star spangled banner performance? Dude was absolutely reamed on LSD.


TwoManyHorn2

I think OP meant that he wasn't necessarily on drugs *during interviews*, which seems a reasonable enough claim.


bomberesque1

Fucking legend


wubwubz0690

He was just living man


[deleted]

Sounds just like my career in the military.


RWolf7963

Hahaha yes! Now when someone catches me masturbating I will feel less shame knowing this legend got caught as well.


169partner

Rock star in the making shit


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fuck_you_thats_who

Left apprehanded.


Sinaura

So that's how he got so good with his fingers


Uresanme

His discharge papers said something like, “unable to speak in coherent sentences.”


oldgar

Make love, not war, even if there are no women around.


Indigoal

I read one of his biographies a long time ago. There was a big list of things he tried to do to get out of the army. Not quite on the level of Ted Nugent, but some pretty weird stuff


athomehesatourist

“Last week he was sent down to Da Nang to see the Navy head shrinker, and the crazy fucker starts jerking off in the waiting room. Instant Section 8.”


1291815

Ayyy, I was in the same unit as him. His military record is honestly on par with most Rakkasans.


AlbertaBoundless

You haven’t lived until you’ve jerked off in a blue rocket in minus forty.


girseyb

I wonder if he was caught left handed?


discountErasmus

Discharged from the US Army with a referral to the the USMC.


GDPintrud3r

Im my country these things would get you in jail not discharged


saliczar

Sounds like he discharged


[deleted]

Attention on dick!


sk8605

His ballsack


precious_hamburgers_

Sooooo...he was an average soldier?


dagaboy

Probably above average, considering this was draft era.


IAmHoltron

What a wanker 😉


TonyOstinato

i was practicing going quickly between fret positions. this is the closest length to a guitar neck


TheLogicalCentrist

Did my time in the military, everyone is masturbating everywhere.


aquias27

Gotta de-stress somehow.


emileif

I mean he was bipolar. We tend to do some pretty wild shit.


rollitorbowlit

He was getting changed doesn't anybody knock


ThaddeusMaximus

Some are army men, some are not.


ulises314

Fucking legend.


patricks3880

More power to him!


SlobMarley13

What a bamf


Stardancer86

Being at Campbell probably didn't help.


Bookoflists

His first night after being discharged he had no where to sleep. So he wound up sneaking back into the barracks for a warm place to sleep.


benhasbeenbened

Meirl


Villain222

Sounds like an honorable discharge


Lubberworts

The way he treated his guitar, it's not surprising he injured himself.


Chuckiechan

Masterbating with his teeth?


Misterstaberinde

If he was a marine it would have just been business as usual


OwnInteraction

"Whelp, if I'm not going make Master Sargeant, may as well Masterbate."


tally06

Private hendrix was observed fondling a mop handle as if playing it and then setting it ablaze.


TrickshotCandy

Very rock and roll! Lol


darthegghead

Image is one of him masturbating and shredding licks with his penis


herbw

Wankers, all.....


NightwishForever

What is 'on detail'?


WhileFalseRepeat

That means a work assignment or job responsibility. For a person of his low rank it would typically be something like cleaning the bathrooms or being on guard duty. In other words, he was wanking while on the job. ;)


OakParkCemetary

Is the pic related?


bigoak1

Not one fuckin dude in the military can say they have never rubbed one out on gaurd duty. It's like a challenge you just have accomplish.


sunjoe33

Damn Jimi was doing the knuckle shuffle with the piss pump


BayLakeVR

Based Jimi!